to be shaken? or to be still?

when i get really nervous i start shaking. for real. like when i give speeches in class for example. sometimes when i'm on stage. when i talk to certian people. hehe. and probably when i try to order food too.
anyhow.
my phone has this really cool scrolling postit thing on my wallpaper, and one time i found this really cool verse, so i put it on there. it says "I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be shaken." beautiful huh? thats psalms 16:8, btw. and then the other day a friend texted me psalms 21:1-7 which was REALLYYY cool, cause verse 7 goes "For the king trusts in the Lord; through the unfailing love of the Most High he will not be shaken."
i like it when stuff like that happens.
and now for the story...
i have a strange, strong dislike to mention to anyone outside of my immediate family whenever i get sick. so even though i'm back at college and i've been pretty sick for the past 5 days or so, no one really knew. aha. i think some of the jackson family stubborness from 4 generations ago found its way in my blood. :P
last night i felt the worse. my fever was 102.2 and my cough was.. pretty bad. i mean, i think i've felt worse, but for some reason i was pretty scared and i began begging God to make me feel better. especially cause all the freshmen move in tomorrow and i want to make a good impression. jokes. but really. it felt like horrible timing, and i let Him know i thought so.. and could he pleaseeee strenghten my faith by, you know... healing me super duper fast! haha
i had sent a text to a friend asking for prayer abt my fever, and instead i got a response that said something along the lines of "i pray rather that you would be able to rejoice in the new trial the Lord has given you - as He opens your eyes to our frail we are, and how supreme he is over all."
they weren't trying to belittle my pain, but to remind me of the reason we go through these hard times and how awe are to respond - by praising the Lord instead of fearfully doubting His wonderful plans for us.
oh, it was so humbling.
but then, it was so wonderful.
have you ever had those moments when you feel sooo small and you are suddenly super overwhelmed by our HUGE God and His HUGE love for us... that unconditional love that we will never, ever understand? it was one of those moments. i was completely and utterly blown away. and the pain and the fear i had felt were nothing compared to the peace that comes from trusting Him.
to be shaken.. or to be still
u know, back in exodus 14, the Isrealites were pretty shaken. here they were - stuck between a sea of water and a sea of angry egyptians. they had thought God was helping them escape from. so they called out to God - not praising Him for what was to come, but begging for what they had before. they would have given anything at the moment to once again be slaves in egypt. but moses says "Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to BE STILL."
i hope you know the rest of the story. its quite wonderful. God opens up that sea of water, and ALL His people walk through. and then the egyptians start charging through, and the waters come back, killing every last one. pretty gory, but it goes to prove that our God can do WHATEVER He wants to glorify Himself. hallelujah, amen!
i'm pretty sure that after that whole rescue, not one of the isrealites had any desire to be slaves again in egypt. and in the same way, i (who had be grumbling to my Savior, wanting to go back to good health) was suddenly glad for the whole ordeal because it had taught me a lottttt about peace and trust, being shaken, and being still.
kinda like thats song... "Be still, there is a Healer..."
i've been singing that a lot. in my head tho. the voice still isnt back to normal....
 but i trust my Savior anyway. He knows best for me. :)
"Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
(Psalm 46:10)